WHAT KEEPS ME UP AT NIGHT

While I have been sharing in this blog my experiences as I push forward this movement, I have also been sharing my person.  You have probably figured out that I love to laugh, I love to laugh at myself, I like to think, I am learning how to execute my ideas, I hold my loved ones dear to my heart, I’m a Christian, I like different, and I have a passion for writing. There are many parts to me and this is just a small (no pun intended) snapshot of who I am, what I value, and what I do. Speaking of the doing, there are many roles that I play too. I want to believe that this movement is rubbing against each of these roles and creating some friction that will catch aflame.  

One of the roles that I have played about 20 years is as a learning and development professional. If you read my profile to the right, it tells you a little bit about what I have done professionally. (Check out my LinkedIn profile for a more in-depth view of my professional life at http://www.linkedin.com/in/zoebrown725. Please note: If you don’t have a LinkedIn profile, you should set one up. It is definitely an important social networking tool.)

I really love playing the role of a learning and development professional. The scope of this work matches my personality. Doing this type of work allows me to exercise my gifts. I realized a long time ago that it is my purpose in life. I am not perfect at it, but I am good at it and I absolutely love to keep adding tools to my toolbox. And it doesn’t hurt that it has been my bread and butter. In short, throughout my career I have had the honor of being who I was created to be and doing what I love – facilitating the continuation of learning in adult learners.

A meaningful learning experience is the platform that I will stand on, in my high heels of course, for the rest of my life. I have a deep and sincere need to hold in high regard adult learning principles.  Here are a few thoughts about adult learning that I have to uphold:

• I have to resist the urge to tell adults what they need to do. Most often, they already know what to do; they just might not be motivated or clear on how to do it. My job is to provide prompts that facilitate the construction of knowledge. I also believe that my job is to help widen the frame so that adult learners can see more of a bigger picture. Sometimes seeing a different or bigger perspective is all somebody needs to push forward and go.
• I have to keep in the forefront of my mind that everybody brings something to the table. Everybody has something to contribute regardless of what they believe about themselves, regardless of what they have been told. When this principle is demonstrated, it really makes people feel good about who they are.
• I have to remind myself that practice doesn’t necessarily make perfect, but it really helps in the learning process. When learning is taking place, it cannot stay in the knowledge only realm. Telling somebody something is one thing. Showing them how to do it and making them show you they know how to do it is another thing. Skills should be practiced and learning should be applied in authentic contexts. This helps adults examine their mistakes, push to make improvements, evaluate their progress, and become better learners.
• I must remember that one principle that has followed me throughout my career - the best learning experiences are an inch wide and a mile deep. Trying to “teach” 10 things in an hour is not the business. Trying to “teach” 1 thing in 2 days is more impactful. (There isn’t a formula for how long to teach anything. The idea is that you spend enough time on one 1 thing so that people experience a rich and deep learning.)

Sleeping at night is a rare
occasion.

I am clear that one direction of gonegirlgo™ will lean toward the development of a meaningful learning experience for women who are ready to push forward and go. I am ecstatic about joining two of my passions. This is the stuff that keeps me up at night.

Peace

(PS...I think I wrote this because I have encountered some boring training over the past few months. I abhor boring training. They make me sleepy.)

Note to Self: Challenge Yourself to Grow

I realize that as a middle aged woman, I must make it a point to move my body. It’s just plain wrong for me to settle for a sedentary lifestyle. Sitting still is not going to work for me as I journey on this side of my timeline. That’s why I have made a commitment to work out at least three days a week. 

I like the amenities of Lifetime Fitness, but I can’t seem to stay committed to working out there, even though I enjoy spending an hour on the fancy elliptical or joining the cardio-kickboxing class with this one trainer chick. My work out of choice is boot camp style with the ladies (and sometimes gentlemen) of True Image Fitness. There’s just something about working out with others in that narrow space that activates my spirit. I love it when our movements become synced. I love reaching that zone when my body is at its peak and I have to push past that feeling of wanting to stop. I love encouraging the group to do the same. I love how Kathy gets us and keeps us pumped with her firm, but loving instruction. (I can hear and see her now shouting at the top of her lungs with a smile on her face, “Yeahhhhhh!” I really try to model her when I do my thing because I believe that people need to be loved through the process of moving their bodies, especially because many of them haven’t moved in a long time or even at all.)  And of course, there are a couple of songs that make me way to excited!  Most of all I love it when we are encouraged to challenge ourselves to grow.

In the exercise world, which I am no expert on but rather a mere enthusiast, if you keep moving the same thing in the same way and never switch it up a little, there is a chance that your body will adapt to those movements. Your routine may not give you the results you want to see. You might get bored, and boredom can lead to demotivation. There’s this one exercise that I do on Thursdays that everyone absolutely hates. (You should see the looks that I get when I tell them it’s time to hit the floor.)  It’s called “The Swinger”. You are on your knees with your head up looking forward. You extend a leg straight back and then you just swing that leg out to the side. I like to do 2 sets of 10 reps on each side. If I am feeling especially pumped, we might repeat the move one mo’ ‘gain. It is the perfect butt, hip, and core move. And it is the perfect move that challenges everyone to grow.

I envision myself crossing the
 finish line.

Here’s how this relates to gonegirlgo™. If I am going to see any results from my efforts developing this movement, then I have to resist the urge to do the same things that I have been doing and challenge myself to grow. I have to remain teachable. I have to switch it up a bit and make a paradigm shift in my thinking. I have to begin envisioning the outcomes that I want to see. I have to lean into some discomfort. I must have many more of those conversations that I dread having with myself. I have to push back the urge to want to quit all together. I might even have to let a few people go. You want to know what the coolest thing is about all of this? The fact that that I am surrounded on all sides by a fantastic group of loved ones who are praying, encouraging, pushing, igniting, loving, uplifting, and motivating me through it all. 

Let me leave you with a little poetry: If you are so compelled to push forward and go, I beseech you all to challenge yourself to grow.

Peace

Things Can Happen Accidentally On Purpose

Before today, I had no clue that
raccoons possess a certain power.

I really, really, really hate admitting that I am addicted to FaceBook. Not that I think that this addiction is a totally bad thing. It does have its place in my life now. The way I use it has primarily shifted over the past few months. It started as a way for me to stay connected with my sisters and other family members. I  love seeing pictures of Navi and Jaden (my niece and nephew) considering they are more than 700 miles away. It was where I gave birth to my trademark. I have been able to reconnect with old acquaintances. And because I am an e-learning enthusiast, I recognize the potential it has for transforming the learning process. Now I realize that my FaceBook posts also provide fodder for this blog and other writing assignments that are down the road. (Disclaimer: Please don't be alarmed by my use of words. Just go to dictionary.com and look up fodder. Vocabulary words just aren't for kids, you know.)

I am not necessarily proud of the amount of time that I spend on FaceBook, especially lately, but I really do get a lot inspiration and encouragement reading most posts (Sometimes I think that I need to delete a few people cause our mindsets really don't line up, but then again, that might be a good thing. Isn't it important to know about other views that don't necessary line up with yours? Uh huh. I thought so, but that's another topic!). This morning, someone posted this scripture, "For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them." I really try to make sure that I read every post that's a quote from the Bible. It doesn't feel right skipping those posts knowing that I took the time to read an actual status update about a party attended over the weekend, a quote someone likes, or a rant that somebody needs to get off their chest, but I skipped over God's word! Well, this particular verse really stood out to me today, and is the point of this very post.

I believe that everything that has happened in my life was prepared beforehand - before the beginning of time, before the beginning of history, before the beginning of my ancestors, before the beginning of my parents, and before the beginning of me. I know that it might be a challenging notion for some to believe and that is ok with me. I don't mind challenging you or being challenged myself because that's how we grow. Remember, this movement is not about prejudice, bias, and stereotypes.  It is my belief and you can choose to subscribe to it or not. If you are reading this, I would hope that you would hold my belief with some regard because I have chosen to share it with you. So, let me make this point.  Now, since this (what I believe) is the case, then I also must believe that things can happen accidentally on purpose. Things that I had no control over, but were prepared beforehand for me to walk in. You still tracking with me? Several things have happened this way recently and I can't help but be amazed:

• Seeing Dawn at TJ Maxx almost two years ago without a notion that our friendship would blossom and that she would be that one person to encourage me to push forward and execute that one idea.
• Meeting Terre at Opus when I clearly wasn't interested in making new friends, even though my heart was crying out for a change. I know she is tired of me saying this, but I am so glad that we connected. Her energy has rubbed off on me in such a good way.
• Having that raccoon who has the same schedule as I do interrupt my drive to work two days in a row. Based on Native American beliefs, this animal has the kind of power that has been surfacing in my life recently. (Please note: I am not going to start worshipping racoons now, but it does make me feel a certain way identifying with my Native American ancestry.)
• Praying with Deacon Domingue this past Sunday who after I shared with him my prayer request, said, "You should look up my daughter. She might be able to help you." Truth be told, I really wanted to pray with Vanessa J., but she wasn't available when my turn came. What's really funny about this accidental thing that happened on purpose was that I didn't even know that he had a daughter!!!! But I'm glad he did. I looked her up on Monday, and we talked today. And she is cold y'all, really like cold blooded (not the reptile version, but the slang version of the word). After we talked all I could say was WOW.
• Losing my precious job in October 2010. If I had still worked for Head Start, I would have never pushed forward with  gonegirlgo™ because Head Start was such a consuming passion for me. I grew up professionally in Head Start, and spent about 15 years in that environment. I guess it was time for me to leave that comfortable nest.

I can think of a few more things that have happened to me accidentally on purpose. But don't you think that these are enough to contemplate right now? I do.

Peace

Girls Want to Have More Than Just Fun

So I have been thinking about the use of the word girl in my trademark and wondering if it offends anyone.  I am real sensitive to issues like this, probably because of my background in diversity. The word girl doesn't bother me despite the fact that I am as tall as that 6th grade girl who went to Randallwood back in 1979. Maybe it is time to dig a little deeper into my thoughts about using the word girl.


First, it isn't meant to be offensive. I look at it more like a term of endearment. Like when you call your really good friend on the phone and when she answers you say, "Gurl!!!! I got something to tell you!!" Or when a friend calls to offer you that much needed advice like, "Gurl, let me break it down for you!" I guess it is short for girlfriend. Womanfriend just doesn't sound right, you know? And I think that the second half of the word friend has more meaning than the first half girl.


On the other hand, I know that girl may have some negative connotations attached to it. It may bring back memories of a dark time in our history when women of color (or any woman for that matter now that I think about it) were not considered worthy enough to be respected or revered. (This is something that I really want to explore further, but not today. It's on my list, though. This would make for a good conversation.)


There's also something about the word girl that to me connotes vibrancy, youth, energy, and freshness. A girl is at the beginning of her journey. Her outlook on life is hopeful. There is a world of possibilities before her. And she has the energy and the wherewithal to explore those possibilities. Woman has a different connotation to me. When I think of the word woman I think of the womb, birth, wisdom, experience, knowledge. The dreams she had as a girl may have vanished. She is in a different season of life and may feel a little more settled and may be less inclined to explore and take risks.

Girls just don't want to have fun!

Now I am not saying that a woman can't live life with the vibrancy and energy as a girl can. All I am saying is that in terms of gonegirlgo™, my intent is to attach a sense of wonder, curiosity, energy, vibrancy, and openness to the movement that some of us as women may have lost somewhere during our journey. This girl (me) may not have grown in stature, but I have grown up. Now I am reclaiming traces of that youthful spirit that I had when I was 11. And because I have a good deal of experience at life now, I also know that I want to have more than just fun! I want my life to have meaning too!


I am not sure if I am totally clear about the use of the word girl yet. I have to remind myself that this movement is still unfolding. But I must admit, it does sound better than gonewomango. That's not catchy at all and it probably wouldn't read well on a t-shirt.

So here is a big shout out and tribute to all the wonderful girls who have been and still are a part of my life. Girl, your presence in my life has made it a good ride.

• Girls who raised me and taught me the value of education, relationships, and family
• Girls who I have known since they were born 
• Girls who are my sister cousins
• Girls who I grew up with on E. 151st and Sunset Drive 
• Girls who came into my life for a season
• Girls who have been my best friends since 1990 and will remain my best friends until we all pass away
• Girls who like me slept, ate and breathed Head Start (some of these girls still do)
• Girls who are cold at running their businesses
• Girls who have loved me despite me and my mess
• Girls who are my ride or die chicks
• Girls who I have been on a spiritual journey with
• Girls who love to get the cardio in at True Image Fitness
• Girls who I have known for a short time, but feel like I have known them forever
• Girls who have done me wrong but didn't realize that what they did actually made me better (I can flip this one too cause I have been the girl who has also done wrong to another...)

I think you know who you are. Let's keep pushing forward so that we can all go!
gonegirlgo™

Random Thoughts That Really Are Not Random

Zoe at a party in Winchester, MA circa 1984
(Like the hair?)

I think that I already mentioned that I have been an avid journaler since the age of 15. It started while I was in a program for minority students called A Better Chance (ABC). I went to school and lived in a small town called Darien, Connecticut for 2 1/2 years. I was 1 of 6 minority females who lived there. And it was hard, especially because in the mid 80's multiculturalism was not the business. It was not cool for the kids who went school with me to know 80's hip hop, 80's urban slang, or anything "black" for that matter. 


Writing became my way of checking in with myself because I was invisible and didn't exist for a big part of my day. I needed to stay in touch with me. Of course, now I say that. As 15 year old girl, I didn't have a clue as to why it became an important part of my regimen. I just felt compelled to get my thoughts, ideas, fears, prayers, wishes, out of my head and on paper. And I did it so freely and regularly. I say that back then, writing saved my life.


Throughout my life my journaling has changed and there were times that it stopped all together. Funny thing is it usually stopped when I was in a "good" relationship, then started back up when the relationship turned "bad". Then I remember at some point my journal became a book of prayers. I was having trouble praying out loud. I hated fumbling my words to the Lord so I decided to write down my prayers. I did so earnestly and intently for about two years. It made me feel like David of the Bible. That journal really means a lot to me and I still make it a point to read it on a regular.


Now, this blog thing is taking my journaling to another level. Here are some random thoughts about blogging (and other stuff) that permitted me to get only 4 hours sleep this morning:

The girl who will never know
that she was in my blog cause she
won't read them.

• What's in my head is becoming public. It's kinda scary to let others into my head. Not because I think you think that I am crazy because I already know that I am. It's scary because I might run out of things to say. Or  better yet, I might run out of clever things to say. Who wants to read a blog that reads like a homework assignment, right? (I have to figure out a way to get Imani to read my blogs. The other day I was so desperately trying to persuade her to start reading them. She told me "Mom, they (my blogs) make me feel like I am reading homework."
• Public is the new private, in this case. I think I am going to make everyone sign a privacy disclaimer! You know, like when you sign the HIPPA paper at the doctor's office every time you visit. I'm just not sure what I will put in the disclaimer, though. I still have to think about that.
• Sometimes it's good not to have anything to say. I need to practice silence like my friend Mary Jo did. The only thing was although she wasn't speaking, she was writing. I might have to flip my vow of silence to speaking and not writing. So don't be mad if I don't post anything for a stretch of time. I might be in my silent mode.
• I mentioned before that gonegirlgo™  and this push forward is connected to a spiritual element for me. It is hard for me not to put it there in my mind. I have defined my forward movement and again, your forward movement is going to be different than mine. The key to this thing is for all of us to push against stereotypes, prejudice and bias as we embark on this journey together. I don't want to turn anyone off who may not believe what I believe. But I do believe that gonegirlgo™ is for anyone, regardless of the role of spirituality in their life. 
• I love Esparanza Spalding (these are random thoughts, remember?) and I can't wait til I see her in concert.
• In some kinda way, I have to make a connection to pushing forward and going in my high heel shoes. They give me super power. (clickety clack, clickety clack...that's the sound of my heels pounding on the pavement as I prance on by...)
• Ummm...I'm all out of random thoughts.

 It's always my pleasure to let you in my head. It's humbling, refreshing, and satisfying. Peace z

The Conversation that I Dreaded Having With Myself

Pushing forward my ideas about the potential of gonegirlgo ™ is really challenging me to step up to the plate and move. I have never felt so compelled to do something in my life. I am truly amazed at how this unfolding movement is itself causing me to change my approach to life. I feel my speech getting stronger. I feel my walk getting stronger. I feel my ability to connect with others getting stronger. I am truly astonished by the influence of this passion in my life.  

It is confession time, though. I have a weakness that I must admit right now. I am a procrastinator. I will wait until the very last minute to get that thing done. I will think about it. I will have every intention to set the time aside to do it. I will even write it on my to-do list. (I am ashamed at how long one project has been on my to-do list. I’ve got to change this, y'all!)

People who know me and love me are very gracious to me because of my weakness. They know that the end result will be the bomb so they just let me slide. But I am tired of sliding. I want to be a reformed procrastinator. I want to challenge myself to grow in managing my time and my energy. So hence, the fourth component of gonegirlgo ™ - Be a Reformed Procrastinator.

I don’t have any answers yet that will help me push forward with this one. And that’s funny to me. The one component of this movement and my big weakness has got me at a loss of words. I guess it’s something that I need to dig a little deeper into. So my internal work will involve asking myself some hard questions.  So here's the conversation that I am dreading to have with myself: 

Me: Why do I procrastinate?



Look in the mirror and have a difficult
conversation with yourself!



Me: Because I think I can beat the clock and I put too much on my plate in the first place.

Me: Ok Zoe, I just answered this question with two issues – beating the clock and overwhelming myself. Let’s talk about this beating the clock thing. Why do I think I can beat the clock?

Me: I don’t know. I never really had this conversation with myself before. Maybe I think that because I can figure stuff out pretty quickly that I don’t have to start right away. I mean some of my best work was created at the last minute, right?

Me: Yeh, I get that, but I am driving myself crazy doing that all the time. Just because I can figure stuff out fairly fast doesn’t mean it is a healthy thing to do. I want to push forward and go, right?

Me: Yes, of course.

Me: Then work on becoming a reformed procrastinator and stop waiting until the clock strikes 12. Get the thing done, now! gonegirlgo ™

The Power of Meaning Making

I hate it when I wake up in the middle of the night or before my alarm goes off with a thought. That means that I will not be getting my last few hours of sleep. That very thing happened to me this morning. My internal alarm went off at 3:55. I decided to make the early rise worth my time so I began to write this very post.

The "what if" conversation

I'm in the process of planning an event and was exploring online ticket sales with my girl. She found this one site that we liked so I started clicking on the featured events listed on the home page. One event in Australia caught my eye. It's called What If 2012. It looks like an organizational visioning summit of some sort. Here's their vision, "our vision is to transform Tansmania into a powerhouse of creativity by the end of this decade." Wow! Really? So you know my mind got to going...

What if you had this conversation with yourself:

• What if I did "the" one thing that I always wanted to do before I left the earth?
• What if I did something that mattered to me without limiting my thinking about it?
• What if I stopped complaining about my life and started living my life?
• What if I went somewhere in Cleveland that I had never been before?
• What if...(you get the idea, now fill in the blank.)

The bottom line is that you have to start pushing against self imposed limits if you are going to go.

gonegirlgo™ component #3

A Sister Trying Not to Live by Default

I wrote this on August 28, 1998.

Life is a series of trips.

Back and forth,

to and fro,

here and there.

Sometimes I feel like I should go forth, fro, there,

but how come I find myself going back, to, here?

Answer:  Because I am living by default.

In my mind I have created these series of trips,

But then I realize that my mind is the ultimate trip…trippin me out all the time.

But it’s all good b/c it’s my journey & no one else’s.

It belongs to me & it represents something that amazes me like God amazes, like life amazes me.

Not in a loud, boisterous way, but a subtle, easy, warm way.

I sit back and smile (when I am not living by default) & enjoy the ride…

Back and forth,

to and fro,

here and there.

Why should we live by default?

In a season of desperation, I coined the term living by default to describe my existence as a human being who had all of their physiological functions in order. Living by default meant that my life was possible only on an account of having a heart, lungs, a brain, nervous system, stomach, liver and all of the other internal organs that made me go.  The dilemma was that while living by default was truly a gift from God (as far as I knew, all of my internal organs functioned properly) if life had no meaning or purpose, it was a gift free from responsibility. Simply put, living by default is an absolved life. It is a life that has no meaning, purpose, or direction.

At different points in my life, I wrestled with the application of this concept. When I lived by default, I did not feel good. I was depressed, lazy, uncertain, bored, and uninterested. I went through life’s routine without any motivation or determination. I rarely had concern for anything bigger than myself. I just happened to be existing by default.

On the other hand, when my life had meaning and purpose, I became a different person.  No matter what crazy turn of events came my way, I was able to overcome them because I had a purpose to fulfill and goals to accomplish.  One example of this was when I co-led God’s Beauty Shop, a bible study that I created for my church a few years ago.  During that time, I was experiencing a tumultuous time in my marriage, but God’s Beauty Shop gave my life meaning and a reason to push through the pain of my marriage.  When I didn’t live by default, I felt confident, assured, strong, and hopeful.

One of the four components of gonegirlgo™ is refuse to live by default.  My experience has taught me that a person who desires to push their ideas and dreams forward can’t if they are living by default. They are going to continue going back and forth, to and fro, and here and there in a desolate, bitter, and possibly painful state. Here are three lessons that I learned whenever I lived by default:

1. I did not have any desire to seek my purpose in life.  I was complacent, lazy, and full of excuses as to why I was not living progressively. 
2. I did not hold myself accountable to anyone to actualize my purpose and what I should be doing with it.
3. I had no motivation to explore the intrapersonal. There was no desire to go within and do the inner work of the soul.

gonegirlgo™ stands for pushing forward in life. If you are going to go, you have to push the desire to live by default out of the way. Find your purpose and meaning in life. Tell someone that you trust about your purpose so that they can help you remain accountable for moving in that purpose. And when you find it, do the inner work that is required so that you don’t get in the way of going forward. Life really is a series of trips, but at least while we are on the journey, let’s go with a smile in our heart.

Now that you have read my description of living by default, I’m curious to know how you make meaning of the concept.  What experiences can you share that illustrate the point – refuse to live by default? What lessons have you learned?   Please use the comment area below to share your thoughts.

A Push Forward: The Birth of a Trademark

gonegirlgo_™

As I entered into another season of my life, I stumbled upon this trademark and it really does signify my current state of being. It is an internal proclamation of freedom, a declaration of independence, a statement of progress, and a call of forward movement. Starting in 2012 and going forward, I have decided to give myself permission to go on and go.

So how did I come to this conclusion? Last summer I had an epiphany that I was a middle aged woman. I had to laugh because the picture I had in my mind of who that woman was certainly did not resemble me! When I shared this with my dad, or “G” (short for G-Dad), as we so fondly call him, he simply stated, “Yea Zo, I guess you are.” My recognition of that reality and my dad’s confirmation of that reality rang in my ear for the rest of the summer. I am in the middle – the middle of my life, the middle of my career, the middle of my journey. As the oldest of three girls, I have never been in the middle before so it was hard trying to relate. (S/O to all of the middle sisters in the world, including mine!) This sudden realization of my median position ignited a pilot light in me!  Call it middle age crisis or call it what you want, all I knew was that I needed to do something before my time was up!

As I consider the timeline of my life, I cannot go back and redo anything. But I can go forward…wait a minute…what if I decided to go forward a little differently than I had in the first half of my timeline? What would happen if I pushed all of my energy forward? What would happen if I interrupted my life with a new trajectory?  (This is my confession: You see, I was a dreamer who was always afraid that my dreams would turn into nightmares and haunt me. I had ideas, I mean great big ideas, but I wasn’t able to see them as reality. I contemplated, walked with trepidation, analyzed, and second guessed myself out of believing that I had worthy ideas and dreams.) There was just something about being in the middle that compelled me to engage my ideas and dreams and push them forward. 

I thought that writing a blog would be easy because I kept a journal since I was 15 years old. You would be cracking up at how many times I backed up, scratched out, and deleted my words. I wanted the words to flow easy like they did in my head. They didn’t when I wanted them to at first...only at the most inopportune time which turned out to be the best time. The pilot light was lit so I had to go. 

gonegirlgo_™

Not only did my trademark surface because of my middle condition, but because of the current condition of many women that I know. I have witnessed how we have walked with trepidation, ignored our calling, gave others the power to talk us out of our dreams, second-guessed ourselves, downplayed our strengths, and kept ourselves constricted and confined to our own little box.  I was not created to live by default, but that’s how I was living because I refused to step out of my box.

My trademark was actually born on Facebook.  Whenever I read a female’s post that seemed to be a cry for forward movement, I would respond "Gone girl go!". I thought, “Wait a minute! That means something and I’ve got to do something with it!” Because I had this habit of thinking a lot, and not moving forward with my thoughts, I was in new territory. (Uh oh - my mind started with that ole negative self-talk again. Would I fail? I’m not ready. That’s just stupid. Who cares anyway?) Nope! I wasn’t giving in to it this time. I remembered my middle position and pushed forward.

The first step that I took was to share my thoughts with a few close friends. I was shocked when as soon as I said it, they got it. They understood immediately what I was talking about. They encouraged me to explore the concept so I just had to move.

During this time, another fascinating thing was happening to me. I was being surrounded by other women whose pilot light was ignited as well. I got a chance to see firsthand what happens to a woman when she pushes forward, engages her ideas, and lives her dreams. Again, I just had to move.

On my nightstand.

On the floor.

To organize my thoughts, I created this mind map. It was rough, but from it I was able to see what my trademark was all about. Then I started drafting the blog. This rough sketch of the mind map and blog sat on my nightstand for about 3 weeks. It ended up on the floor at some point and stayed there for another week. I finally put it in my bag to take to work.  It sat there for 2 more weeks. When I pulled it out again, I said “Go. What are you waiting for?” The mind map got dolled up in Visio. With some tweaks here and a few more edits there, it was good and I was determined to finish this blog. Now…

 gonegirlgo_™

There are four components to services that I will offer based on my trademark:

1.    Define your own forward movement

2.    Refuse to live by default

3.    Push against self-imposed limits

4.    Be a reformed procrastinator



All dolled up.



I’m not sure how this will all unfold, but I am excited about pushing it out there. So stay tuned! I will use this blog as an accountability tool to let you know of my progress pushing forward. This should be fun but hard! Y’all with me…let's go!